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Writer's pictureGayathri Ganesh

Breaking the Cycle of Abuse - Ft Do Patti


Do Patti Movie

Do Patti, a Bollywood movie starring Kriti Sanon, Kajol, and Shaheer Sheikh is a thriller mystery that revolves around the life of Soumya and Dhruv. The movie throws light on how abuse between parents can have a huge impact on children and how it takes a lot of courage for women going through abuse to step out of abusive relationships. Soumya who falls for Dhurv, marries him after a series of troubles with her twin sister Shailee. However, as the marriage unfolds, Soumya finds herself trapped in a cycle of abuse. Torn between wanting to win the battle with her sister and her well-being, she endures the pain until she reaches her breaking point and decides to fight for herself. Here are five takeaways from the film that need more attention.


  1. Abusive parents can take a toll on the children, growing up.


Growing up, Soumya has seen her mom go through a series of abuse that ultimately led to the demise of her mother. Since the reason behind her mother’s death was swept under the rug, her own uncle asked her to remain silent about the abuse that happened to her mother, Soumya was made to believe that the abuser always goes unpunished. This is reflected in her future relationship with Dhurv where she chose to stay despite the abuse he put her through.


  1. Witnesses of Abuse who remain silent are equally responsible.


When people know someone they know is going through abuse and choose to remain silent because they think it’s a couple’s “personal matter”, they are equally responsible and guilty as the abuser. A couple do have their personal matters that the public shouldn’t be involved in, but abuse isn’t one of them. Soumya’s uncle knew of the abuse that her mother was going through but remained silent. He also silenced Soumya and Shailee from not reporting this to the police officer after their mother died of abuse.


  1. Abusive men show signs of toxicity in the early stages of a relationship which are often overlooked.


Abusive or toxic behavior usually doesn’t emerge out of nowhere. It has always been there within that person, and it can be seen through subtle changes in their behavior which are mostly overlooked in the beginning thinking it to be just a normal form of anger or even sometimes manipulated by the abuser. Dhurv has been the one who loses his temper quite often. His quick jump from Shailee to Soumya because she’s the “easy sister” is another toxic trait that was overlooked in the twin sisters’ rivalry.


  1. Children should never be the reason that keeps you from stepping out of an unhealthy marriage.


Many people who go through a difficult marriage choose to stay in that situation because kids are involved and they don’t want to put those kids on the series of separation turmoil. Soumya’s mother didn’t voice out her pain because she was scared of leaving the kids behind. She was scared of stepping out because she wanted to protect her daughters. In reality, it is better to separate, be independent, and co-parent than stay in an unhealthy and unhappy marriage where the kids grow up watching their parents fight and their mother getting abused. Stepping out not only saves you but also the people around you who love you.


  1. Stepping out of an abusive relationship takes a lot of courage but it is possible with the right support system by your side.


Soumya did something that her mother couldn’t do. She sought help from her sister and her nanny, who helped her through the court proceedings and freed her from her abuser. Stepping out isn’t easy, it puts you through a lot of emotional and mental trauma but, with the right set of people by your side who are there to listen to you, help you out in every possible way and just be there for you, give you the courage to step out and voice out your pain.


Do Patti resonates with Project Kintsugi’s mission, inviting us to challenge societal norms of silence and support those facing abuse behind closed doors. At Project Kintsugi, we believe that stepping out of an abusive relationship, though daunting, is possible with the right support. If you or someone you know needs a safe, empowering space to break free from abuse, introduce them to Project Kintsugi where they can be supported and guided by the right set of people. Together, we not only help them break free but also take a stand against cycles of abuse.


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1 Comment


Abinaya
Abinaya
Nov 10

Amazing! Great inferences from the movie! ♥️

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